Friday 21 November 2014

Motivation is the golden key to success

I've always been someone who doesn't usually force things to happen, I often sit on the sidelines waiting for things to happen, slowly and surely I have been changing this…

University is hard and I honestly wish I had chosen a completely different degree, but I'm now nearly 2 and a half years through my 3 year degree and there's no point failing at the final hurdle. For the entirety of my time at University I have been finding it growingly difficult to become motivated and excited to complete all of my assignments,  I have finally found this motivation…better late than never right? A couple of months back I got the idea into my head of becoming a College Tutor/University Lecturer of Media, but the one thing I didn't do when I was thinking about it was choose to do anything about it…I have just finished filling out my UCAS application for a Postgraduate Teacher Training course at Edge Hill University and I can honestly say I have never been more excited about something in my life. I feel that doing this, choosing to make the decision and actually do something about it, has really given me the motivation to complete my current degree to the best of my abilities, with nothing holding me back…it's time to charge straight ahead!

So, like the title of this blog post says, motivation is the golden key to success. This is a statement that I truly believe, I feel that if you're not motivated you can NOT succeed, you need the motivation to guide you towards the succeeding. 

Speaking about motivation, for my entire life I have hated me and I cannot think of one time or point in my life where I did not. I've been trying ti like myself, even if it's just a little bit, apparently you can't love someone else unless you learn to love yourself, which I kind of agree with, how can you expect someone to love you if you do not love yourself? You wouldn't expect someone to do something you wouldn't do, so why expect them to do this? Anyway…getting a little sidetracked over here. As I was saying, motivation, hating myself, yes, so…(sorry about the rambling) I'm going to take it upon myself to lose weight, to help get to a stage where I might like myself a little. I love going to the gym, I really do, but when I started going, I did stop after a few months, not because I didn't want to go, more because I got distracted, I was busy and once I fell out of the routine I found it so hard to get back into it. The difference I will have this time is the fact that I will have the motivation, I have that on my side and with that, how can I fail? 

Things will change, I'm going to be posting a little list of things I aim to achieve in the next however long…I often post monthly goals onto this blog, but these will be different goals, these will take much longer to achieve, but I will never give up.


Make sure that everything you do in life is for you because if it's not you will never, ever stick to it.

Until next time 

xo 


Friday 14 November 2014

Life is for living!

Things have been a little different lately.

I have been figuring out so much about myself, about where and who I want to be and I'm actually excited, for the first time in a very long time!

At first, I thought going at life on my own was going to be hard, I thought I was going to fail and just spiral into the state of depression that I have usually gone into in the past, but this time was different. You don't know how happy it makes me to say that things are different, and it's noticeable, they really feel different.

University is really stressful this year, I'm really not going to lie, I'm feeling the pressure already and it's hard. I need to make sure I stay on top of everything, saying that, I haven't finished writing my script yet…It's okay though, I am feeling a lot more motivated than I was a few weeks ago, I have something in life worth fighting for, my career, it's the only thing that matters.

I'm in the process of filling out my UCAS application for further education teacher training courses and I am so excited about this! I have ALWAYS loved the idea of teaching but I never really thought I was good enough, I never thought that I could actually do it…but, I've been thinking about it a lot, why couldn't I do it? There is absolutely no reason to say that I can't and that's exactly why I AM going to do it.

This time next year I will HOPEFULLY have graduated from Liverpool John Moores University with a BSc in Broadcast and Media Production(hopefully a 2.1 or higher) and I will HOPEFULLY be working towards my Teacher Training and I can't wait!



Whilst doing this, I need to work, I want to work, I don't care where, I just want to save, save and save a bit more! Once all of this work is done I am really going to take some much needed time for myself, I'm going to travel for a year and it's going to be wonderful, traveling is the thing in life that makes me most excited and I am going to make it happen, you heard it here first…I WILL BE TRAVELLING IN 2016/2017!




It’s always nice to know what you want in life, but that means nothing unless you’re willing to do something that works towards it, knowing what I want to do is making me a much happier and positive person.

Until next time!

xo

Wednesday 12 November 2014

Reasons I am 20 and single

People fall in and out of love all the time and it's a huge part of life. 

Recently I have come to realise that there is no rush in finding the truest form of love. For we are still young and that should be enjoyed. These are the days we will never get back, this is our youth and we should live it for us. These are the years that we should be spending building a life for ourselves, a career, travelling and being happy. The time will come when love get's it's turn in life, that's the moment you start a family, expanding the life that you have created for yourself.

Never rush your life, enjoy being young whilst you are still young.

I'm currently 20 and single and do you know what? I'm loving it! Life's easier when you are living your life for you rather than for someone else. Your 20's are your selfish years and I aim to take advantage of that, I'm going to live my life how I want to, just for me. I'm going to finish uni, build a career and travel as much as possible.

Here's a list of the reasons I am currently single…enjoy?

Staying in > going out.

I have noticed a lot of people, some who I have been close to in the past, really don't understand my need and want to stay in rather than go out. Clubs are most certainly not my scene, I can't think of anything more that I would hate doing. I'd much rather spend my Friday evening with my xbox completing a Halo campaign or ranking up as much as humanly possible on Call of Duty (Maybe it's not a humane amount…maybe it's a little excessive) or even sat watching episode after episode of any television show on Netflix (Because I will watch them all, I don't care what they are about)

I want to travel.

Is it just me or does it become harder to travel the second you commit to a relationship? You might not agree with this, but your idea of traveling compared to mine might be a completely different thing. I want to be able to pack my bags and spend days, weeks, months or even years in a country just because I can and I don't want anything holding me back from this. People expect you to stick around for them but the second you start doing this you begin missing out on opportunities that could have changed your life. I want to see as much of the world as I possible can and preferably whilst I am young, I want to visit country after country, see things I've only ever dreamed about and it's the most exciting part of life to me. 

Commitment

How can you commit to something at such a young age? How do you know where you're going to be in 5 years time, or what you're going to be doing. A relationship means tying yourself down, as much as most people won't want to agree with this, it's completely true! The moment you get into a relationship, every little thing in your life changes, maybe it's for the better, but from my past relationships I know that I have missed out on so many opportunities and I will never forgive myself for this…plus, I can't even commit to watching a film on Netflix, I often get bored, committing to a person is a much bigger thing, but you get the idea. 

Sleep makes me happy

I like to sleep, I really do and other people wouldn't understand. The moment you say "I woke up at 2 today" you are going to get some funny looks. It doesn't make me lazy! You don't know how long i stayed up the previous night!

My Best friend > You

My best friend is my soul mate and that's pretty much it. The hardest person for anyone to compete with is her. I basically have a life partner in her…minus the, well, let's not go into that actually. Everything I could ever want to do in life I could do with her, without the whole "commitment" thing. I want to get a house with her? That's fine, we're besties, we're never falling out! I want to travel? I wouldn't want to travel with anyone but her, mainly because we are hilarious and it would be the most amazing experience ever. The only person in this entire world who isn't going to judge you for who you are is your best friend  they don't care if you've been sat in the same spot for 2 weeks straight watching continues episodes of Supernatural in your pyjamas with no make up on, in fact, they will probably applaud you for the fact that you've managed to watch 5 seasons of Supernatural in 2 weeks, that's a huge achievement. 

I hate people

How can you be in a relationship with another human being when you generally dislike most of the human population? It's just not really going to work is it? People do irritate me though, the stupidity and eagerness to irritate one another…no thank you! I'll be fine with 28 cats thank you!

Fictional characters and celebrities

I'm in a one way relationship with WAY too many people (Jensen Ackles, Zac Efron, Louis Tomlinson, Danny Jones, Luke Hemmings, James McVey, Justin Long, Shaun Sipos etc) and quite frankly, I just don't think that there is any room in my life for another guy.

I'm waiting for a mad man in a box.

The Doctor will come, contrary to popular belief he will and we will travel time and space together, lot's of wibbly wobbly timey wimey fun will be had…

I have an unhealthy relationship with my xbox

My xbox is my entire world, if I could spend my entire life playing xbox I would…I should have became a games tester! Seriously though, I can't get enough, games are my life, it's the thing I do as soon as I walk in from a long day of university…although it stresses me out more than university. Everyone who plays COD probably needs anger management, I am included in this. OH! Guess what you can get on xbox? NETFLIX! My relationship with Netflix is just too much. I recently started watching Orange Is The New Black, it took me around 3 days to finish watching 2 seasons of this show…I can't explain this okay! 

I don't have the time!

I'm a University student, actually, I'm a final year University student! This takes up A LOT of time, especially with being in my final year, I am forever writing scrips, completing paper work, completing coursework, doing assessments and it really is very time consuming. As well as this I have to split my time evenly between my two best friends…my actual best friend (Purple Tits) and my xbox and it's extremely hard to distribute the time evenly between the two. I also have a family! I already have no time left and I have to find some hours in my week to see them! Can you see my problem now?

My Degree 

This is the most important thing to me in my life right now and nothing can come in the way of it. I have messed up so many times in my life and this is the time I need to get it right! My degree determines my career and I won't be happy with anything lower than a high 2.1/1st, I haven't got myself into around £50,000 worth of debt just to get a degree classification that I am not happy with!

10 other reasons:

1. My life is too busy as it is for a relationship.
2. I hate having to tell someone everything about my life…what I've done all day, where I've been etc. 
3. I can't base my life around another human being…
4. I can't cook and I hate cleaning…do it yourself please!
5. I want at least 18 cats.
6. I hate meeting new people.
7. The Internet...
8. If you're in a relationship, you're expected to share your pizza…I don't want to share my pizza.
9. Nothing beats a food night and movie/television show marathon…NOTHING!
10. I'm awkward.

This is just the reasons why I am single, I'm happy for all those who are in a relationship and are happy, good for you! Everyone is different and that's just not what I want right now. 






Live your life for you, be happy, that's all that matters! 



Until next time! 

xo 


Saturday 8 November 2014

Life goes on

I haven't blogged for awhile, so I feel like now is a good time to do so!

A lot has changed since we last spoke, my whole life has completely changed and is this for the better? I honestly couldn't tell you…

The past few weeks I have felt so down with everything, I've been trying to get myself out of this mess I am stuck in and it's so hard. What makes this even harder is that people don't seem to care enough to understand and that just infuriates me. All I have ever wanted in life is to be happy and I can't help but wonder why this is so hard. I hate how things are always rooting against me, waiting, for me to fail… I won't fail, that's the last thing I will ever do, I will never give up. 

My plan is to completely throw myself into University, it's the only thing that matters right now, people always leave, and they always leave too quickly and without a care. The one thing that is always going to be there is my career and my dreams and it's time to make them happen. I'm fed up of over analysing every single aspect of my life, over and over again, never resolving anything and always worrying, thing's need to change, and I know this, it's the only way I can be happy.

My anxieties have got increasingly worse as of lately and it really does suck because it's affecting everything, too much. I will make it my aim to fix this, I can't continue being the socially awkward person that I am, I will change that, in my own time. One thing I wont change is who I am as a person, my identity, I like to game and I love nothing more than indulging myself in a television show, and that's never going to change, that's what I enjoy doing and as you all as my witness I will not change that for anything or anyone, it's one of the few joys that I get out of life. 

I hate growing up, I just want time to slow down or even rewind, I want to go back to when life was simple, when I didn't worry or stress. I'm fed up of being a ticking time bomb of stress, I hate it more than anything. 

Dreams are the only thing that gets me through each waking day, until the day progresses that is, when I begin to worry if they will ever come true, worry if I have the power to turn these dreams into reality. 

I can't wait to get the ball rolling and get a house with my lovely bestest, it's going to be amazing, it's the first step in a long line of things that will make me happy…


Until next time! 
xo

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