Chapter Four: April

I know, I know, I haven't been posting as much as I promised that I would this year, I definitely haven't been keeping on top of my goals as much as I had planned to, in fact I didn't even set any for the month of March! It's all going to change, don't worry your pretty little heads!

Hello glorious Friday! I never understood why people enjoyed Friday's so much, I guess most people finish work for the week, but not I! I think each and every day is just as beautiful as the next, maybe that's the reason why. To be honest with you, I don't seem to work that many Friday's although I am this week! I always find my days off to be hectic, even more so than my work days, maybe because there's so much that I need to do, and also so much that I want to do, and i just can't possibly find the time to do all of it.

It seems a little strange when you think of a new month starting on a Friday, it feels like the end of the week (even though it isn't) and I guess you'd just expect a new month to always start at the beginning of the week, I don't know.

Making April Happen

Monthly Goals:

1. Read 4+ books. I really want to get back into reading a lot more, it's something I miss, a lot! It's something I struggle to find the time to do, but something I will start making time for!

2. WRITE! Writing is one of the things I love the most, I just need to write more, it's going to make me happier, whether this is blogging, script writing, or even finally starting that book I've been meaning to start.

3. Blog at least once a week. I adore blogging about anything and everything, sometimes I do find it hard to find the time to do it every week, but that's hopefully going to change!

4. Read before bed. I need to find a way to wind down before sleeping, something that doesn't involve technology.

5. Watch 25 films. I adore films, every single kind, so let's see how many I can watch this month.

6. Say NO to fast food! It's usually without noticing what I'm doing that I purchase some form of fast food, this is the month that I won't touch any, no matter what.

7. Spending freeze. I find myself forever spending unnecessary month, how am I ever to save for my worldly adventures if I am to continue this way? That's why this month I won't be spending any money on anything I don't need, wanting something isn't a good enough reason to blow my dollar.

8. Enjoy the little things. Sometimes in life, the little things can be the most amazing things, these are the things that each of us need to learn to appreciate more, I need to appreciate everything a lot more.

9. Simplify. It's time to get rid of the things that aren't needed in my life, whether that be clothing, paperwork, or toiletries, it's time to make space for the things that I actually need in my life.

10. Be happy.

Weekly Goals:

1. Read an entire book every week.
2. Blog at least once a week.
3. Visit the cinemas.
4. Make time for writing.
5. Disconnect from the world once a week.
6. Sort through files and e-mails.

Daily Goals:

1. Read every night before going to bed.
2. Wear my glasses every single day.
3. Eat home cooked meals.
4. Take a photograph every day.

Do you have any goals for this month? 

Share them in the comments below!

Confidence

Sometimes that I spend a lot of time thinking about is confidence. What does confidence actually mean? And what does it mean to be confident? 

Confidence 

If you asked me a few years ago what I thought it was like to be confident I would have told you how I felt that only the most beautiful of people can be confident, but if you asked me now? It would be a completely different story.

There's more to who you are than just how you look, there's so much more to being confident. I detest how other people feel they have the ability to decide when someone is being overconfident, or when they decide that someone just doesn't have the right to be confident at all. Just because someone doesn't look the way you do, is a different skin colour, a larger or even smaller size than you, doesn't mean that they don't have the right to look and feel confident. Confidence isn't all about your appearance, it's about you as a whole, about how you feel about yourself. 

When I was of school age I found it exceedingly hard to come across as a confident person, mainly because I felt like I didn't have the right to feel confident, I felt ugly in my own skin and that was that. Some people absolutely radiate confidence and although I don't, I do sometimes show my confidence and there's nothing wrong with that, it doesn't mean I love myself, it means I'm becoming happy and confident about who I am, and why shouldn't I be allowed to love myself anyway? I'm probably the most socially awkward person that you will ever meet, which makes coming across as confident quite hard, it doesn't mean I'm not confident, it just means I find it incredibly hard to just put my confidence out there for the whole world to see.

I think that it's important that everyone knows that they have the right to feel confident, no matter who you are, how you act or how you look. I'm currently on a long road, learning to love myself completely, learning everything about myself, becoming familiar with everything about me, and I assure you that once I have reached the end of this journey being confident may be easier for me.

No one in this world will every be perfect, no one, it's all about realising who you are, realising that all of your imperfections are what makes you perfect to who you are. Everyone has flaws, everyone will probably have a huge list of flaws, me included...my thighs, my belly, my nose, my freckles, my hips, then there's being a constant stress head, being fearful, and the list goes on and on. That doesn't mean that I can't learn to love these flaws, it doesn't mean I can't be confident about who I am regardless of these flaws, because I know that although I have so many flaws, I also know that there are so many things about me that I should be confident about .

To have such a soft heart in such a cruel world is strength not weakness. 

Be true to who you are, that's something that I make sure I do every single day of my life. 

I'm shy and uncontrollably socially awkward, but that doesn't mean that I shouldn't be confident about who I am.

People judge too much, too harshly, on just about EVERYTHING. Be confident, love who you are, show that you're happy and you don't give a damn what anyone else thinks about that.  

Until next time

xo